gaurav's view

 I sat alone another day.
The world was moving all around me,
but it seemed as if my life was in a standstill.
The doctors say its anxiety.
Everyone thinks anxiety means nervousness or fear,
but it is deeper than that.
Anxiety holds you prisoner.
You can't leave your house.

Ding
Dong
Ding
Dong

The doorbell rings but I can't answer.
There is too much fear inside.
You can't answer the phone.

Ring
Ring
Ring

"Telephone for you!" my family yells. I
tell them to say that I will call back, but I won't.
You can't eat.

Chomp
Bite
Chew

No, not me. The anxiety
even controls that. All the pain rushes back up with
every little thing I eat.
You can't go out.

Step
Step
Step

Everyone walking around me, but I can't move, the
apprehension paralyzes me.
Everyone says, "Be brave. You can do it. You'll make it out of this."
But sometimes I wonder if I will.
I try to combat it all, but if I attempt to do anything,
it all starts over again.

Thump
Thump
Thump

My heart beats faster and faster.
I can feel it in my chest.

Beads of sweat
Racing
Falling
Running down my forehead.
All the thoughts swarm in my brain.
The fear picks up.
It is unbearable.
I'm so frightened, but I don't know what of.
The paranoia sweeps over my body like a giant wave.
Every day I have to fight what seems to be a losing battle.
But then . . . I look outside.
I see the colors.
I see the life.
I see spirit.
I know I can do this.




Dil Lagi Ki Kisi Ko Aisi Sazaa Naa Mile
Pyaar Ke Bina Jeena Zindagi Aisi

Kisi Ko Aisi Mout Naa Mile

Kamm Se Kamm Sambhalne Keliye
Dostoun Ka Sahara Toh Mile

Zindagi Me Sab Ke Din Hain Chaar
Ussme Kisi Ko Bhi Itne Gham Naa Mile

Mohabbat Hoti Nahi Sabse Zindagi Me
Jis Se Bhi Ho mohabbat Ho Dil Se

Bass Dil Ko Uss Se Bewafai Naa Mile
Hum Toh Jee Lenge Kaise Bhi Unke Bina

Bass Humari Wajhe Se Unki Aankhoun
Ko kabhi Aansoo Naa Mile